Ticking on

I am happy that I can say that I have not lost my father yet. He continues to fight this battle between life and death. I can only imagine how difficult this battle is for him on the inside, working for every single breath. Knowing that he is not afraid to die, that is not why he is fighting.....he has a vision of where he is going and is excited to be there when the time is right. He just doesn't believe that it is his time.....so even though his lungs are failing, his heart is failing, his kidney has failed......he keeps on ticking. There is a large part of me that does not want to see him suffer and wants him to move on to the better place he is going to. But this small part of me is very happy to have my dad still here.....that I can still say that my father is not dead. Although he hasn't been able to kiss me or hug me, or tell me that he loves me...he is still here. I do selfishly hope I get those one more time.......